"To have some idea what it's like, stand in the outside lane of a motorway, get your mate to drive his car at you at 95 mph and wait until he's 12 yards away, before you decide which way to jump."
"When you're poor, you know nothing about the future, you know nothing about the world, nothing that goes on outside 300 yards around you."
"The good thing about L.A. is that there's always someone more famous 100 yards away from me."
"Southern political personalities, like sweet corn, travel badly. They lose flavor with every hundred yards away from the patch. By the time they reach New York, they are like Golden Bantam that has been trucked up from Texas - stale and unprofitable. The consumer forgets that the corn tastes different where it grows."
"Prison service vans that travel 90 miles to take a prisoner 90 yards paedophiles free to leer at children in the very parks where they have committed horrific crimes."